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BREAKING NEWS!

Policy compliance.

New Company Policy To Boost Productivity Backfires

Mundanity Corp. is currently under fire for implementing a risqué ‘hump-day’ policy. WEST DEPTFORD, N.J. — In response to plummeting employee morale over the bizarre kidnapping of one of their own, Owlie McOwlerson, back in January, head … [Read More]

NGE photographers capturing the paparazzi.

New Tabloid To Spill The Beans On Other Tabloids

HOLLYWOOD, Calif. — A new tabloid, The National Gossipers Enquirer, will soon be launching with the intent of exploiting the secret lives of existing tabloids and their staffs, according to a random press release. Promising to “give the scoop … [Read More]

Apple Inc.

New Year Gimmick Goes Awry For Local Apple Store

CHERRY HILL, N.J. — A local Apple store here were forced to close early yesterday when Apple Inc.’s new advertising campaign, Apples to Apples, resulted in an event that racked up more than $600,000 in damages, according to company … [Read More]

One of the suspected S.W.A.R.M. members on his way to get coffee at the Nectar Ecstasy Café in South Tangerang, Java, Indonesia.

Birds Involved in Human Kidnapping Suffer Fowl Play

Egrets had their captive stolen from them in a double-cross, the FBI said. HONK KONG — Owlie McOwlerson, who was kidnapped from a courtyard outside of where he worked in New Jersey and smuggled into Europe, earlier this week found himself … [Read More]

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Staff Quotes of the Week

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